The Friday Funnies – R U Kathlic? Edition

Friday Funnies jpg

We begin this Friday with a tale supplied by the Friday Funnies Staff Neurologist, “Dr. Mc:”

Three Boys

THREE LITTLE BOYS were concerned because they couldn’t get anyone to play with them.

They decided it was because they had not been baptized and didn’t go to Sunday school.

So they went to the nearest church. But, only the janitor was there.

Janitor

One little boy said, “We need to be baptized because no one will come out and play with us. Will you baptize us?”

Sure,” said the janitor.

Toilet

He took them into the bathroom and dunked their little heads in the toilet bowl, one at a time. Then he said, “You are now baptized!”

When they got outside, one of them asked, “‘What religion do you think we are?”

The oldest one said, “We’re not Kathlick , because they pour the water on you.”

“We’re not Babtis , because they dunk all of you in the water.”

“We’re not Methdiss , because they just sprinkle water on you..”

The littlest one said, “Didn’t you smell that water?”

They all joined in asking, ‘Yeah! What do you think that means?’

Little Larry

“I think it means we’re Pisskopailians!*”

* To readers outside of the U.S., the Anglican Church is known as the Episcopal Church in the U.S.

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… Speaking of Kathlicks:

Roamin' Catholic

Catholics Driving Fast'Catholic families believe in the holy acrimony of marriage.'

… Speaking of Baptisms:

Baptizing a cat

… Speaking of cats:

Cereal killer

… Speaking of killers:

Cheeseburger stabbing

… which somehow brings us to …

Why Women Live Longer Than Men

(with a hat tip to “B-Squared”)

Why Women Live Longer Than Men

… now is as good a time as any for …

Drum roll

This Week’s Walmartian

Walmart-always

Walmartian-Red_vs_Blue

The Walmart Car Show

Walmart_car_show

Shane, The Walmart Deli Clerk:

Walmart Deli

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Blonde Joke du Jour

blonde jokes-sm

Why blondes can’t have acupuncture:

Blonde-acupuncture

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Lawyer Joke du Jour

Shark-Attorney

Lawyer joke du jour

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Snark du Jour

Snark-jellyfish

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Groaner du Jour

(Hat tip: “B-Squared”)

Groaner-In Tiers

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“B-Squared” sends us the next two items:

Authentic Mexican Food:

Authentic Mescan Food

Mexican Words of the Day:

Mexican Word-of-Day1

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From across the pond, “Ol’ Petrol Head” sends us this item about nutrition:

A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Brisbane:

“The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water.

However, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have eaten, or will eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?’

After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, ‘Wedding Cake.’ ”

#1 Cause

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Taking things a bit too literally:

Drive-through pharmacy

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We close now with this note of encouragement:

Ground

2 Comments

Add yours →

  1. Thanks again for the smiles. However I am disappointed that Shane has discontinued the extended warrantees on his chicken!
    Smiling is good for me.!

    Like

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